Memory Project

It is my deepest desire to teach our children everything I possibly can about their dedicated and loving mother.  However, alone I won't be able to do Dianne's legacy justice.  I'd like to compile a detailed volume of experiences, stories, lessons, jokes, etc regarding Dianne. 

As you think of something, please email your memories to me.

I will compile them and post them to the web-site.  Memories often spark memories.  Dianne was so very dynamic.  Something that she may have shared with one of you could very well spark a related memory in another.   As the page develops, I'll be able to share those accounts with Austyn, Camdyn, and Ainsley. 

Believe me, our children KNOW their mother.  They are walking testaments to her strength, courage, and character.  Through their really can see Dianne.  Through you, and your shared experiences, they will know their mother even more.

Eventually, I'd like to publish a book with our combined memories for the children to have.   Lofty goals - she deserves so much more.

Please email your memories at:

Thank you! 

1 March 2005

Wow!  I have received quite a few emails from friends relaying how excited they (you) are to be able to share their memories of Dianne.  Please, pass this web address to everyone you think may have had some interaction with Dianne.  I'm sure that everyone that met her, even if for only a moment, will have a positive memory.  She had that profound of an impact on virtually every person she met.

Thank you for contributing!  We truly appreciate your thoughtful responses.

3 May 2005

    I thought back to our childhood, my big sister who endlessly pushed me on the decking tire swing so I could pretend to be Wonder-woman, or the "shows" that we would put on for Mom and Dad that we practiced for hours together in our room.  I have a  memory that is one of my favorites and that was of Martie picking me up from school one day and hearing about a girl who picked on me and made me cry.  She turned that Mazda around so quick and pulled the thing upon the curb a few inches from this girl and got out of the car and let her know who she was and what she would do to protect me!  I just remember smiling and thinking, "YUP, that's MY sister!", and how cool it was to have her to help me.

    That's just it, as I miss her my heart seems to bring up so many memories that I once took for granted but know seem to be all I have.  I realize just how much she was always there for me.  She was the one who helped me pick out my Junior Prom dress, she gave me the sweater and skirt I wore the day I was baptized.  Martie got me all set for my Senior portraits and stayed through the whole thing making me laugh so I could get good shots, and one of my favorites I have Martie doing my makeup for my Wedding day.

    As I look back now I realize that she was there for me through so many milestones in my life, Martie was there.  I can only cherish these close and look forward to the time I can finally tell her how much she meant to me, to see her smile ,and once again hear her laugh.  For now I will hold on to what I do have of her - an example of what a Daughter, a Sister, a Wife, a Mother, and most of all, a beloved Friend should be.

Amber Williams, Sister

10 May 05

    Her laugh is something that I dearly miss.  She had the uncanny ability to make the most mundane task fun.  I miss looking over my shoulder to see her poking fun at something I had done:  her face all scrunched up, eyes closed, smiling from ear to ear, and her head nodding up and down.  She was able to find the humor in any situation.  Even when she was frustrated, or struggling, she found a way to make others around her smile. 

    Not all of her smiles were the same.  She had the head-shaking smile (mentioned above), the smirky-smile, the loving, eyes-closed smile, just to name a few.  Any time she played a prank on someone (Q-tip trick - select family members know that story) she'd break out the full-on noggin-shaker smile.  It was enough to make you stop what ever you were doing and join in the fun...even if the fun was at your playful expense.  The smirky-smile was somewhat of a trademark of hers.  She'd do this if you snuck a picture of her (very hard to do!), or if you unexpectedly caught her in a proud moment.  The picture of her on the day we brought Austyn home from the hospital is a smirky-smile.  She was so proud to finally be home, so proud to be a mother.  Then there's the loving, eyes-closed smile -- reserved for the select moments that touched her heart.  Whenever one of the children would affectionately rub her hand, or stroke her face, or even pay the simplest compliment, you'd see the eyes-closed smile.  If you've seen that witnessed the very essence of her loving nature.

    Her smiles could alter the course of your day.  They were always genuine and passionate.  Every time she smile, I knew that I had done something worth while.  The affirmation of her smile - yet another "something" that I miss. 

Jeff Rowlison, husband

Sunday, May 29, 2005

     Today I took my granddaughter Ainsley Cierra Rowlison (love the sound of her name) to get her ears pierced.  She has been waiting in anticipation for months and the day finally came.  She clung to my hand and kept tenderly rubbing my face with her soft little hands during the ride to Pearlridge.  We walked through the mall - Steven in charge of the boys who wanted no part of the ear piercing headed off to the arcade.  Aunty Meg, Cousin Ashley, Ainsley and I stopped to eat a pretzel before reaching the jewelry store.  As usual I found myself looking at every little detail of this perfect little person sitting beside me.  I am in awe as I know her mother would be when I look at her soft brown eyes, her dimpled smile, and her long beautiful curly hair.  She is a unique combination of her dad and mom and my daughter would consider her absolutely perfect in every way.

     Ainsley chose pink flowers with a clear crystal center.  She sat very still and continued to smile as the ear rings went in.  I gave her a hand mirror and watched her turn her head from side to side watching her reflection, the smile never leaving her face. Another sad, sweet moment where images of another small girl, with a dimpled smile came across my mind making my heart feel  weighed down with the realization once again of how much my daughter has missed out on.  Then back to the present and I know that Martha would smile and be so happy at all of the love and support each of us give to one another as a family.  She would have been especially proud of Jeff for letting me share this special time with her Ainsley at a time when I know he would have liked to be there.  Hopefully one day Ainsley will look back and remember the happy day when she and Nana got her ears pierced….    


Brenda Handall, Mother

5 Oct 2005

In 2 Years...

2 years!

In 2 years Austyn has practically doubled in size. In 2 years he's fully overcome his speech delay and is starting to realize only the tip of his learning potential. In 2 years he is regaining some of the confidences lost because of the these 2 years.

In 2 years Camdyn has grown into his role as our little "sherrif". In 2 years his personality has developed into your image. In 2 years he is still the loving compassionate little boy that you inspired.

In 2 years Ainsley has matured both physically and emotionally. In 2 years she remains the stunningly astute beauty that loved rubbing your feet. In 2 years her beautiful spirit has grown even more than her golden locks of hair.

In 2 years the children have not let a night slip by without acknowledging you, praying for you, and voicing their pain with your absence. In 2 years you have not been diminished. In 2 years we have populated our home with more pictures of you than you would be comfortable with....but that we are comforted by. In 2 years we have cried, colored, talked, screamed, sobbed, hugged, and argued. In 2 years the children have missed your calming voice and gentle way. And, in 2 years, we have missed the FOV.

In 2 years I have missed the force with which you mothered our children, composed our home, and loved without reservation. In 2 years I am humbled by the choice you made to marry me. In 2 years I have loved you more. In 2 years I have missed eating chips with you in bed. In 2 years I have realized that I love you enough for 200 years. In 2 years I miss you more than my tears can express. 2 more years we'll miss you more.

2 years!


Jeff Rowlison, husband